Simply Sensual

By Audrey Pinkmane

With Valentine’s Day come and gone, there is a problem that a lot of people confront on a such a romantic day.

Expected Sex.

Whether it’s before a special evening you have planned or a photo session with Julia that’s been scheduled, let’s face it, there are some times when you’re just not feeling sexy, and that can get in the way of things. Maybe you’re not feeling sexy because you ate a bunch of cheese, or maybe you’re not feeling sexy because someone at work said “Wow, you look so tired today, are you feeling okay?”

For whatever reason, it’s the basic truth. Sometimes you just don’t feel sexy, and that can make it hard when you planned to be intimate with a partner or have a session to take boudoir pictures.

But that is okay.

First of all, a disclaimer: If you’re not in the mood to be sexy, you absolutely should not force yourself into something you aren’t going to enjoy at all. You should never just power through any type of sexual relations if you aren’t 100% invested.

Not only will it not be fun, but it can lead to less enjoyment of future fun times. If it starts to feel like a chore, your sex life is going to take a big hit. So make sure your sex always starts with an enthusiastic “Yes!” from both parties.

Now, when you aren’t feeling in the mood physically or emotionally, but mentally you really want to be in the mood, there are a few things you can do…

• 1
  Make yourself feel beautiful. Fix your hair, do your makeup, try on some lingerie, or even break out your birthday suit. There are many times that looking at yourself and feeling good about your appearance can make you feel more erotically charged. This works for sexy situations at home, or when you’re in the studio. Looking great can lead to feeling great.
• 2
  Think back on times when you have felt particularly lascivious. Think about your best time, or times when you felt like you were going to explode with desire. Thinking about those things can really put you in a headspace where your body will mimic the feelings it had during those times. Your heart may start to beat faster, your breath may get a little heavier, etc. When taking boudoir pictures, these thoughts can be your best friends.
• 3
  Use your imagination. Everybody has fantasies. If you’re like me, some of the fantasies you have are ones that you don’t ever want to do in real life, but you love thinking about. Think about those during the moments that you’re not feeling great and imagine how great it is in your head, or if you plan on fulfilling those fantasies, think about how great it will feel once you finally do.There is no greater erotic fiction than the one in your head. Thinking about fantasies and, in cases like mine, believing that you are the type of person who would do such things, makes for some great photos and some frisky times.

So there you are. Three ways to put you in a better headspace when you’re not feeling it. All of these things are good to do before and during a boudoir photoshoot, as they will really add to the realism of your photos. And always remember, stay confident and stay beautiful.